Boom and clap and everything's wonderful.

Look everyone, it's 2016!

*cue an extremely late firework celebration*

Do forgive me, I have been busy these last few weeks. With ending my customer service assistant job in MPH, constantly visiting our new house to observe the renovation works, entertaining my dad when he has his week-long holiday and going to gym almost every weekday, my life had been awesomely full and satisfying.

2015. Honestly, I've never thought I will survive the year and still standing tall as a whole person with healthy body and mind and emotions. I thought 2014 was a challenge, but good ol' 15 had been more challenging than I've ever expected.

Let's see. I started 2015 with my emotions wrecked, and it was my final exam week. Urgh. So typically tertiary education life. Christmas and New Year with brain explosions with all the algebraic terms, nonsensical equations and formulas that cease to exist the moment the papers end.

Also, around this time, I was so obsessed with genuine Polaroid cameras because I was crazy about analogue cameras. I mean, c'mon. Actual Polaroid cameras, people. The very concept Instax cameras were based on. The originals!  hOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE POLAROIDS?!

Ahem.

I also developed my first film roll from my Smena 8M. I can still feel the anticipation and that sense of accomplishment when I held all of the developed pictures in my own hand. I need to shoot more on film this year. Refreshing all the lessons of composing the perfect settings for a perfect picture. Can you smell the challenge already? :D

While we're on the topic, 2015 witnessed how people unbelievably (as I still have a hard time believing this) trusted my miniature photographic skills enough to ask me to be their dinner photographer. Two, separate-events dinner, I might add. It was an unbelievable journey for me and I still have much much much to learn, but God, the experience was priceless and I'm grateful for every chance they had given and entrusted me with.

Oh and let's not forget how obsessed I was (and still am, honestly) with Taylor Swift's 1989 album, I practically thought that Tay helped me to create a Horcrux for me. It was brilliant and pretty much a masterpiece. And until this day, I can't and won't get over this album. And also, I'm still hung up over the fact that her 1989 World Tour didn't make it to Malaysia. If it did, I swear, you'll find me screaming rather than singing to her 1989 songs cuz I'm addicted liddat.

2015 was also the year I started to read rather excessively, due to me, discovering this God-sent app on my iPhone called iBook. Trust me, this app is the one of the main reason why I spent so many hours with my nose stuck on my phone's screen, trying to devour every word there is. Which later, sparked my interest to work in a freaking bookstore, and I recalled what one of my dearest friends said when I told her about my new job:

"(....) surrounded by the stuff you love."

Also, it is the reason why I've gotten unhealthily obsessed with contemporary poetry (Lang Leav, Micheal Faudet, pleasefindthis anybody?), the Lorien Legacies series and the Shadowhunter chronicles (i.e. The Mortal Instruments, The Infernal Devices, The Bane Chronicles, Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy and coming up this March, a new series called The Dark Artifices).

See? I told you. Unhealthy. And please don't get into my Harry Potter issue. It is universally known how much of a hardcore Potterhead I am, so yea.

Discovered my very own Dauntless crowd by joining the Peer Helpers' 2015 Prolead event. Honestly, I joined this organization to get rid of my social anxiety problem. And helped me with it this organization had been. Besides that, while we're on the same note, I've been slightly vocal about certain issues and voicing out my some opinion of mine and for me, it was a mighty leap. I have learnt on how not to care about other people's feeling when they didn't bother with mine. How to stand tall and confident. Even I am currently still trying to apply all those in my real life, I've never felt better.

And of course, the highlight of the year goes to my Australasia trip while visiting my baby brother who's still studying in Queenstown, New Zealand. Do read about the journey by clicking this Australasia'15 label. I promise you, I'm still sharpening my scenery-photography skills. But here's one for you awesome poeple:

In a tiny little nutshell, 2015 had been an adventurous and challenging year for me. It tested my limits as a person, my strength, my ability to stand strong and not let people see how helplessly depressed it felt. To be frank, 2015 was when I learn what the real world tasted like. But one thing's for sure, it doesn't matter how bad the situation is, what actually that counts are 1) how optimistic you need to be about the outcome, and 2) who's there to be with you and help you to figure your way out.

According to my planning, 2016 is going to be even more challenging. But hey, life's unexpectedly short, so let's do this, shall we? Let's live our lives to the fullest and never giving away any chances to regret. Insya-Allah. Here's to a brand new year :)

*clinks glass*

Sneak peek: VIP Dinner album.

Yes, I am ridiculously biased sister who thinks that my baby sis is insanely gorgeous with simple combination of outfit. Urgh, I patient only.

Tangled up with you all night.

It doesn't take a genius to figure what kind of girl I am; five of my most listened tracks from 1989 somehow could tell you. I promise, you could try to figure me out that way. Yes, I'm not in a good place, but hey. Acknowledging my unseen issues is a start :)

And also yes, Wildest Dreams was one of my favorite (lyrically) song from the album since it came out and I went on the repeat-album loop (then again, Tay's magic songwriting hand made it impossible to have just one favorite) but when I saw the music video, I was blown away by the depth and the meaning behind the acts. As I've said it, this song knows the exact spot to injure my emotions and I'm not sure I could heal it.

Dreadfully simple, but at least it's true.

It all started when I decided to download all the Glee episodes to complete my collection. I mean, I used to watch Glee on the same day as it's released or shown in the USA.

It was when I watched the last number of the season five finale. The New Directions was singing Pompeii and I realized a familiar face among the background dancers; it's Hokuto Konishi from the Quest Crew heeey. In case you don't know, I had (still having it, sigh) this Quest Crew phase and they're this sick dancing crew with a buttload of personalities. They've won the America's Best Dance Crew season 3 so that's saying something.

This talented Hok, also choreographed several LMFAO's video clips too. Urgh these Quest people. They're so talented and crazy and they inspired me to take my Basic Dance I class when I was in foundation.

Cue cruel, sarcastic and disbelieving laugh there. Yeah, I danced, okay people? I also choreographed a dance routine for my hostel members for this jamuan blok when I was in form two. Laugh away, laugh away.

So, I explored my almost forgotten folder of the Quest's videos on my laptop and to make long stories short, I ended up reminding myself how I loved and was inspired by these Quest and YTF (which is another group, this one's full of Youtubers; if you know NigaHiga, then you're on the right track), especially this man called Victor Kim.

Honestly, back then, I was engulfed by this constant darkness and pessimism that I couldn't find a way out of it. This man helped me to believe in myself, and have a bit more faith in the goodness this life had to offer. He sings, and I particularly love this one song of his. I used to dedicate this song to a friend I considered close to, but after we have fallen apart, I don't think this song applies anymore.

But hey, I guess there's no harm in sharing this song and spreading the love, right? So here it is, my favorite, laid-back, beautiful and relaxing song.



If you feel like drowning in the parasitic feelings inside your head, or need a beachy pick-me-up to cheer your day up, give this song a try. You'll get this on repeat in no time. Enjoy! :)

Pre-Raya post.

There's no one to blame when I now am seeing slightly-blurred alphabets on my computer screen. Which at this rate, is somewhat alarming, considering that this case started about a year ago. And back then, it was on the lecture hall's white screen. I suspect my new obsessive habit of reading off ebooks from my little phone is the main cause.

Anyway, it's nearing Raya, and honestly, I couldn't wait to get home. Although this year's gonna be so different since Adan is not gonna come back from Queenstown, so we've ditched the "new baju raya" tradition and all. Hell, I ain't even gonna wear the traditional baju kurung. More like a batwing top thing with a mermaid skirt. Weird, I know. And since I've bought this new rice cooker last month (which apparently got ruined just now after my attempt of making murtabak maggi; in my defence, I've successfully made it before using it but I guess things got too hot this time HAHAHAH k not funny), I've tried to make this kek batik for the first time in my life and it turned out just fineeeee so I wanted to make it for raya.

My baby Polaroid (although it's not much of a baby it's so old luls) is coming home for the first time and I've not use it since my first picture so insya-Allah I'll have enough film to get through raya.

Yeay.

Okay I've just realized something. I was just looking at my board in from of me and my Maori Hei Matau necklace looks like them Lorien branding but mine's shaped like a, duh, fish hook instead of the circular ones. I'm a fishy Loric! Haha geddit geddit? Gila hambar.

While we're on that subject, their sixth book, The Fate of Ten (which the leaked-cover looks suspiciously like it's frosted with ice, a direct reference to Marina of the sea maybe? and I'm genuinely intrigued to find out what'll happen to Ella and Ra's curse thingy) is coming out in about two months! Honestly, I can't wait to get my hands on that book. No, this time I'll try yo get the actual, real book instead of another ebook in my iBook app. I mean, I was hooked when I read the whole (existed) series the first time 'round and right now, I'm rereading them all again and perhaps still remember it when the TFoT comes out.

Don't get me wrong, it's the legacies and numbers that made my head all jumbled up. Like, Four with his Lumen and stuff, Six and her weather, Marina and healing and her ice (which is so cool!), Nine with his everything like seriously, I think he's the coolest. And to think, all of them Garde has more than one legacies (or powers) in each of them.

And (well I've so much to share I guess) for the first time in my life, I've gotten the chance to shop at the Big Bad Wolf! To get eighteen books is so good and self-satisfying, given that I've indulged too much in Cecelia Ahern's books lately, that I've had this strange animalistic to read and read and read more than I used to. I also bought books for my family; I've never had the chance to give them anything really, so a tailored-gift-book for each of em will hopefully make them happy.

It's already past two in the morning. I'm sure he's gonna be upset about how late I stayed up but he also knows how hard it is for me to go to bed early. I mean, this shitty schedule developed when I first start to worry about my intern thing. I mean, I could be awake till it's nearly four worrying about stuff. Yeah it's not healthy, but when I try to sleep, well, that's when my mind starts to question me about loads of ridiculous stuff. Till now, which makes it all not-awesome.

Well, I don't have the best of cuticles and shiz. But violet's cool eh? *winks*

I guess, I'm gonna just baring. Maybe I'll fall asleep faster AND I will stop ranting. Good night y'all!