day 1. write a letter to your past self.
Dear younger self,
You know, you've just wasted a good thirty minutes, trying to repair some HTML codes for your blog's blockquote that you ruined two years ago for trying to be fancy as fuck? I can't believe that I was once an elaborate young girl, because now, believe it or not, I am a minimalist. From a fancy, decorative, particular person to a minimal, simple kind of person.
And that's not even the biggest change you've encountered, trust me.
If somehow this letter ended up in a time machine and got sent back to you, no matter when, don't worry. I won't be like that spoiler person who ended up telling all about the movie content. Just a bit here and there, some things that I am sure will make your life happier.
FIRST, I don't recommend you to fall for a person who is somebody else's, no matter when you are sixteen or nineteen. Just don't.
And please, for the love of God Almighty, listen to what Ibu said about that guy you were convinced you were in love with when you are seventeen. He is not worth your time.
Talking about National Service, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT fall for the guy you will meet in the KN class. He is as complicated as fuck and you would regret having to waste your money texting him, time spent liking him.
Generally, don't fall for guys easily. You have this tendency to like people who seems to care about you a bit more than normal people does. It's either they are just being nice or they are trying to toy with you. With that, you may find somebody who will care about you thoroughly, cherish your achievements and your advantages, but he will also accept your flaws; the permanent ones and the temporary ones.
To be honest, up until this point, I have no idea if you will meet this special man who will take care of you for the rest of your life. They say, when you love someone, you will accept him as a whole, be patient with him and his ways, change his life for the better. I can't say the journey will be easy, but it'll be worth the time and feelings you've invested.
Appreciate people around you. The ones who bothered to let you into their lives. Appreciate their effort, no matter how small it is, or how grand it is. Compliment them. Care about their lives, because they cared about yours. Be happy for them, even if you hurt yourself in the process. Be glad. Be an optimist. Search for the good outcomes and aim for them. There'll be thorns and stuff, but the destination will be sweet, so sweet that you'll forget all the pain and sufferings you encountered.
Don't be too dependent; you are a strong lady. Even if your closest of friends ignore you, man up. Harden that heart, build that "I don't give a damn" attitude and continue to live your life with that as your shield. You can do it.
I don't remember when, but please don't stop wearing that armor.
Be an open-minded person, that kind of person who'll assess every single option available; not just the good ones, but the bad ones too.We could never know if the worst, heart-breaking option will bring the best out of yourself, isn't it? So, be brave. Take the risk but at the same time, be smart about your decision.
Oh, and remember how you cried the day you got your MJSC offer letter? I wish you hadn't. You should know how the next five years of your life was one of the best phase in your life. That was what you want, wasn't it? Don't cry. I know, random. But that's something you should be happy about :)
Another thing, your anger? Don't let it bottled up in yourself. Fucking destructive. Tak tipu.
And a reminder, when Adan ask you to accompany him to watch a Manchester United game on the early 20th January morning, don't agree. MU sucked, big fricking time. And you are going to regret having to watch your favorite team lose, seriously.
And um, go play the Spider Solitaire in your laptop. The fireworks at the end in a hundred million thousand times better then the ones in the old computer. GO!
Until we meet again, go enjoy yourself. Bye :)
Love,
Your present self.
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