10 day letter challenge: Day 9

day 9. write a letter to someone that changed your life

How? Like how you changed my future from the way I see myself for almost three years?

How you pulled me to indulge in your kind of entertainment. I swear, if you hadn't introduce me to The XX, Narmi, Foals, (500) Days of Summer, Ocean's Trilogy, 1234, White Winter Hymnal, Jetpack Joyride, Dumb Ways to Die, I probably will never know them. Ever.

How you convinced me to plan carefully for our future together. Budgets, savings, preparations, our own together-to-do list; it's like studying Engineering Economics and Entrepreneurship all over again when we were discussing finance.

How I've learnt to become a patient person from that hot-tempered bitch I was. To become a less egoistic person I was, back then. To be less pessimistic, more optimistic and more trusting.

How I've never been able to stick with somebody this long, not until I met you. How, no matter how mad I am with you, I know that in the end, everything's gonna be fine. No matter how we fight, or how happy we are, we'll still be there for each other, continuing this complicated love-hate-but-more-to-love relationship we have.

How ridiculous we are hopelessly in love with each other, with no way out. As if in the beginning, there's some sort of permanent glue on our hands and the moment we clasped them together, there's no going back. No matter how hard it had been for us; heartbreaks, breaks, tears, we're still here. Not weaker, never crumbling down, like what I've experienced or seen before. Instead, we got stronger. Stronger than ever.

How the first man of not my blood, spoiled me with so many love, gifts. Never not making sure that I know that I'm in his life, loved and cared. How I've never felt so happy so be slowly accepted into his family. And when I said "him", I meant you. So takpayah gegeh sangat nak emo k? Kmwah.

And how I've never been so sure and content about this, and how I've always dream and hope that this will last forever. You changed my life and I never regret any of it.

You know, dork, I've never regret saying that "Eleh" when you first talked to me too. Or when I listened to the Tongue Tied song and decided to share it on Twitter. Or when I took that challenge to finally reply your first "Hi" for me. Because baby, look where all of those led us to and how our lives changed since then :)

Love, hugs and kisses,
me.

10 day letter challenge: Day 8

day 8. write a letter to someone you've been thinking about lately

Hi handsome.

I was determined to NOT have the two same recipient for any of the letters, but I've been waiting and delaying myself from writing this letter to find another person to, you know, write to. But well, here goes.

Lately, I know I've been sucked into this weird, dark world. Behaving like a paranoid-and-pessimist person, which is not a great combination too. I am secretly hoping that this is not what they call depression, because I've never been past that boundary. And I never want to.

Recently, I'm starting to doubt everything around me. The people around me, the words they said, their looks, their sometimes-hurtful side comments. And sadly, that includes you.

In addition to the latest incident(s) occurred, I'm losing my head. My sanity slips away, inch by inch. Everything active about me, slowly turned passive. More frequent visits from my good ol' nightmare. What's hard is I actually am aware of all that, but I can't do anything about it. Because everything is so ridiculously illogical, and my brain can't comprehend nor accept that.

I want to let it go. But I can't. I keep on thinking about it, about you, about that simple but destructive phase. Don't ask me to let that go, because, like I said, it's too absurd to let that thing go away just like that.

It's touching how you keep pulling me back to our reality, instead of pushing my already-distanced self away even more. How you keep showering me with all the love you have to keep me away from my bad place. How you struggled to keep up with my sort-of depression. How you convince me to not believe in those nightmares and those hallucinations. How you always remind me that you are always there for me.

Believe me when I say, I am trying my hardest to not let what happened get in between us. I'm sorry for dragging you to my bad place. I love you.

Love,
Yaya.

10 day letter challenge: Day 7

day 7 (looong overdue, I'm sorry!). write a letter to a stranger

Is your favorite color, blue?

Do you always tell the truth?

Do you believe in outer space?

And no, I'm not going to sing you the Yuna's song; my singing voice is only exclusive for my shower head only.

So, hi! I'm Nadiah. I'm twenty-not-yet-one this year. Oh yeah, I look younger than my age, thank you :3 I'm still in college and I just finished my sophomore year. As for now, I'm on my break and have nothing to do but size up.

That's joke. And a sarcastic comment. For myself, that is. Haha, I hope you could understand my barely-there joker-me. And I love to use those made up-ish words by combining them with hyphens to make them unique. Haha, I'm not making any sense here.

And I curse like a sailor. Please excuse my French :)

So yeah. Do you play sports? I looove to get to know sports-person. It's like meeting a brother or a sister from another mother and another father. Don't worry if you don't though, because that means, we have more stories to trade, more knowledge to obtain.

I love to travel, how about you? Where have you been? What city, state or even country that you really want to visit? Why you wanna go there? Is the place good? If it's good, tell me. We could trade opinions about those countries we want to visit and even share our experiences? That would be awesome, hihi :3

I know I sounded a bit hyper and bubbly, but in real life, I am not that kind of person. The friendly, talkative type of person. In reality, you'll probably see me at the back of the room, wearing that "arrogant bitch" look, silent as hell, observing people and sometimes their absurd and embarrassing behavior. Maybe wowed by some elegant and proper-looking people. Laughing to others joke from afar. That's basically me.

I don't really open up, but when I let people in, I'll be that transparent, no-secrets kind of person. If this letter ended up in any strangers hand, do come in. I'll let the door wide open this time. It's fun having to just write to strangers. You get to start fresh; no past, but definitely there's a future for us to get to know each other and be friends. Especially for a socially-awkward person like me, it's somehow exciting to finally shed a bit of that awkwardness.

The door is still open. Hi :)