day 10. write a letter to yourself
p/s: I am sooooo sorry for not updating this for almost a month now. With the Eurotrip (will be updated in the next post yeah? Woohooo!), becoming a driver and full-time cooker; so little time were left for me to even hang out, let alone to update this. I've been wanting to, I swear.
p/p/s: and the fact I have no idea what to write to myself. Obviously.
Dear self.
I've actually not even a tiny inkling of idea what to write to you. Seriously.
Like, why would I write a letter to myself when my brain registered my thoughts first before I can even write it? It's weird.
Then again, I could leave a few advice for you to read in the future. But wasn't that what we did on the second day? I can't write about what already happened because that was our first day's task, isn't it?
Haha. Whoever set today's task, is one hell of a person.
Well, since this is the last one in the challenge, I may want to share what I actually feel after completing this. You see, we all are surrounded by loads kind of people. The good ones, the bad ones, the ones who stays, the ones who only dropped by, the ones who guided us to the right path after we've strayed from the true and main route of our life, the ones who teaches you values of life. You name it.
I always wanted to be the kind of person who changes others' life for the better. Sometimes, I think I succeed. But most of the time, I failed.
One day, I realized, that's a useless route for me. I mean, I am a broken person myself. Why should I even think about making others' life better when I couldn't do that to my own self? So, I knew back then that I needed a change. A subtle one, but with a powerful force. I want to be that person who leaves massive impact in anyone's life.
It's a hard purpose, that's so true. But a trait that I've found in myself, somehow amazes me but at the same time, it scares me to (almost) death. My love that I have for everyone that matters to me, can't be described by any words. Love itself branches into so many different, teeny weeny twigs. Like a mother's love, or a sisterly love, that romantic love everybody wants, or that protectiveness you have for your tightest circle of friends, or that love you have for a particular sport, or hobby, or subject, or plant, or even towards a specific place! See how the characteristics differs when all of them are just basically love.
I just simply, love them. Just like that.
It's funny who I'm just a simple person wanting to be a big-hearted girl. But all I actually am is just me. Just me.
So Nadiah, (yes, I'm here) don't ever stop loving those who love you. Always spread the love, but this time? Try to hate less. Your life will be even happier if you do that. Smile more. Never give up. Never give in to your problems that haunt your head. Never ever try to let the feeling of being depressed take over. Never More positive energy won't hurt you. Find your inner peace. Try your very best to win everything; your course, your life, your dreams, everything. If you find yourself back into that dark place again, read this. Understand this. Know that even when somebody leaves, there's still at least two people care about you and you know damn well who they are.
Until then,
your optimist-self :)